I Don’t Want More Time. I Want Less Noise.

Every day, I go to pick up the girls from school about an hour early. Not because I particularly enjoy waiting, but because if I get there late, it’s impossible to find a spot near the entrance. Not that I don’t love long walks in the pouring rain with two tired kids in tow.

At first, I worried about that extra hour. What am I going to do for an hour?

And then, somehow, I started looking forward to it.

Because for one whole hour, there is nothing I have to do.
No room that needs tidying.
No errands to squeeze in.
No one is asking me for anything.

Just me, my cup, my laptop, a book… whatever I feel like doing.

And sometimes, I do nothing at all.

I just sit there.

And that’s when I realized how much I’ve missed the quiet.

I don’t necessarily need more time.
I just need less noise.

Because when my mind isn’t busy jumping from one thing to the next, something happens.

I start thinking again.

A thought turns into an idea. An idea reminds me of something I wanted to write. I notice things I might have otherwise missed. I remember things I haven’t thought about in years.

I get carried away by my own thoughts.

And honestly, I miss that version of me.

The one who had enough quiet for a thought to finish, before another responsibility interrupted it. 

Maybe that’s what I’ve been craving all along.

Not another free hour.

Just a little space for my mind to wander.